School started up again this week, and so we bring you the top 10 names of kids most likely to misbehave in class.
10. Melissa – Melissa likes to scream. She has a shriek on her that’s powerful enough to cause temporary hearing loss. It’s a cross between a banshee and a dying cat.
9. Nathan – Nathan’s mom never disciplined him properly. “He’s not a bad kid, he’s just rambunctious.”
8. Jake – Jake doesn’t speak, he communicates by throwing things.
7. Ayden – Ayden’s voice is inexplicably raspy, like he’s been smoking darts since the womb.
6. Olivia – She’s a hair puller. Her fist operates like lock jaw so when she grabs hold there’s no letting go.
5. Hannah. – Don’t let her cuteness fool you; Hannah is evil. She knows exactly what to say to hurt you on a deep, emotional level.
4. Jackson – Jackson puts everything in his mouth. His snacks, everyone else’s snacks, glue, a box of crayons…
3. Bryden – Not Brayden – Bryden. Bryden makes prison shivs out of school supplies. Bryden will do a stint in juvie.
2. Ian – Ian always has a runny nose. Boogs everywhere. Runny boogs.
1. Nicholas – “I don’t want you hanging out with that Nicholas anymore.”